There has been a lot of media attention concerning performance enhancing drugs in professional sports recently. Congress has apparently felt that all of the other major issues concerning America have been solved (war, gas prices, fuel sources, health care, etc) and decided to tie up resources with an investigation into steroids in baseball. There are people who show serious disdain over the use of steroids to increase performance in professional sports. I propose something else:
I propose that we have unlimited professional sports leagues. Imagine if there were no penalties for using performance enhancing drugs. Imagine how entertaining sports would be! Think about it; people running 100 meters in 8 seconds. Watching a defensive end rip the head off (literally!) a running back. Bone breaking tackles. 500-foot home run shots. 120MPH fastballs. Slam dunks from the top of the key. Entertainment! And we can pay them those millions they demand, because we know that they won't live long enough to collect all of the money. The taking of steroids is a conscious decision, so I wouldn't feel bad if the man with a batting average of .495 suddenly succumbed to a brain tumor, especially since I know there is another 'roid user ready to take his place. Let's see just how far we can push the human body.
Wait! There's more! I propose we also do unlimited NASCAR racing. There would be no limit to the amount of horsepower the cars generate. Restrictor plates would be a thing of the past. People say, "But there would be too many crashes. People would die." So, what!!! Think of the entertainment! How cool to see a car blasting around a track at 275MPH. How cool to watch cars crash at 275MPH! The gore! The pandemonium!
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