Karma is a bitch, part three...

Boy Decapitated by Batman Ride at Georgia Six Flags

Saturday, June 28, 2008

AUSTELL, Ga. — A teenager was killed at the Six Flags Over Georgia on Saturday when he hopped a pair of fences into a restricted area and was struck by the theme park's popular Batman roller coaster, authorities said.

The accident took place at approximately 2 p.m.

Park spokeswoman Hela Sheth said in a news release the 17-year-old scaled two six-foot fences that were clearly marked with signs that read "Danger" and "Do Not Enter."

"We do not know why this person was intent on gaining access to this restricted area," Sheth said. She did not identify the teenager.

"Some witnesses have stated that the individual was trying to retrieve something he had lost. Others reported that he was trying to touch the ride. This is merely speculation at this point, and we are working with park visitors and local police to learn more."

She said no guests on the ride were injured.

Cobb County police were investigating the incident on Saturday. They did not immediately return a phone call seeking comment.

Handicapped parking

Time for some bitching about handicapped parking. I've had issues for years about the whole concept of handicapped parking. Yes, there are legitimate reasons to have handicapped parking, and there are people who should be able to park in handicapped parking spaces. Here is a bitch: In a supercenter like WalMart, why are there handicapped parking spaces? If you are handicapped, and as a result of that handicap are unable to walk from the back part of the parking lot to the store, what makes you think you are going to be able to walk around a 250,000 square feet supercenter?

I think it is way too easy to get a handicapped parking placard. I think it is way too easy to cheat and use somebody else's handicapped parking privilege. I think that if you have a handicapped parking placard issued to you, then it should be noted on your driver license or ID card, because I believe that if you are not evidently handicapped that it should be perfectly valid to confront you and ask you to see the ID permit (HIPAA freaks, rest easy. The ID would not state the nature of the handicap). What if you have a placard because of a family member you are caring for? Then that family member must have an ID card stating a placard has been issued to him/her. This would prevent people from taking advantage of the placard (ever seen an 18 year old kid park in the handicapped spot and run into a store after hanging the placard on the rear view mirror? My idea would solve the problem).

Some people who park in handicapped spaces actually have a strong sense of entitlement. They feel that they have a right to be able to park up front. How bad is that entitlement? We have a new WalMart Supercenter in the area, and some of the handicapped spaces were changed up so that you can essentially parallel park in them instead of traditional or angle parking, thus allowing wheelchair vans an open area to open the side doors and load/unload. The spaces even have the words "Van accessible" printed on the pavement. Go by there at any time of day, and you will see regular vehicles parked in them, because those who feel entitled are essentially saying, "Fuck everybody, I'm handicapped and I'm entitled, and I don't give a shit about the legitimately wheelchair bound handicapped people who need the room to get out of the van."

Actually, I don't think a business should be forced to accommodate handicapped people, to include tying up the choice parking spaces in the parking lot and ensuring that extra money is spent on ramps, wide aisles, and special toilets and stalls. Trust me, businesses like WalMart and K-Mart would survive without the patronage of legitimately handicapped people.

Sounds harsh, doesn't it? But think about it...

Click on the picture to view a better copy...

A question

Why haven't they shown all of the looting going on in the midwest? We have places like Cedar Rapids that are essentially abandoned in the same way that New Orleans was after Katrina, so why not show the liquor stores and Best Buys being looted?

Perhaps because it's not happening there? Makes you wonder, doesn't it? You draw your own conclusions.

During one of her daily classes, a teacher trying to teach good manners, asked her students the following question:

'Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?'

Michael said, 'Just a minute I have to go pee.'

The teacher responded by saying, 'That would be rude and impolite.'

'What about you, Sherman, how would you say it?'

Sherman said, 'I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back.'

'That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table.'

'And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?'

'I would say, 'Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope to introduce you to after dinner.''

The teacher fainted

A simple Sunday posting...

You might have noticed a slight change in the layout of this page. I went into the HTML and changed some of the coding to widen the page. This might cause an adverse affect in your viewing if you are using a traditional 4:3 monitor, but my laptop and desktop both have widescreen layouts, so I conformed my blog to fit my monitors better (after all, it IS my blog! :-)

Anyway, here are some military truisms that we can all relate to:

"A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit." - Army's magazine of preventive maintenance.
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"Aim towards the Enemy." - Instruction printed on US Rocket Launcher
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"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend." - US Marine Corps
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"Cluster bombing from B-52s are very, very accurate.The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground." - USAF Ammo Troop
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"If the enemy is in range, so are you." - Infantry Journal
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"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed." - US Air Force Manual
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"Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never encountered automatic weapons." - General MacArthur
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"Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo." - Infantry Journal
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"You, you, and you ... Panic. The rest of you, come with me." - US Marine Corp Gunnery Sgt.
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"Tracers work both ways." - US Army Ordnance
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"Five second fuses only last three seconds." - Infantry Journal
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Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid." - David Hackworth
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"If your attack is going too well, your walking into an ambush."- Infantry Journal
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"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection." - Joe Gay
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"Any ship can be a minesweeper... once." - Anonymous
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"Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do." - Unknown Marine Recruit
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"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you." - Your Buddies
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"If you see a bomb technician running, follow him." - USAF Ammo Troop
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"Though I Fly Through the Valley of Death ... I Shall Fear No Evil. For I am at 80,000 Feet and Climbing." - At the entrance to the old SR-71 operating base Kadena, Japan
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"You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3." - Paul F.Crickmore (test pilot)
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"The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.
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"Blue water Navy truism: There are more planes in the ocean than submarines in the sky."
--From an old carrier sailor
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"If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it's probably a helicopter -- and therefore, unsafe."
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"When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash.
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"What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots? If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; If ATC screws up,the pilot dies."
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"Never trade luck for skill."
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The two most common expressions (or famous last words) in aviation are: "Why is it doing that?", "Where are we?"
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"Weather forecasts are horoscopes with numbers."
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"Mankind has a perfect record in aviation; we never left one up there!
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"Flashlights are tubular metal containers kept in a flight bag for the purpose of storing dead batteries."
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"Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a person on the ground incapable of understanding or doing anything about it."
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"Just remember, if you crash because of weather, your funeral will be held on a sunny day.
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Advice given to RAF pilots during WWII: "When a prang (crash)seems inevitable, endeavor to strike the softest, cheapest object in the vicinity as slow and gently as possible."
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"The Piper Cub is the safest airplane in the world; it can just barely kill you." - Attributed to Max Stanley (Northrop test pilot)
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"Never fly in the same cockpit with someone braver than you.
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"There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime."- Sign over squadron ops desk at Davis-Monthan AFB, AZ,
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"If something hasn't broken on your helicopter, it's about to."
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Basic Flying Rules: "Try to stay in the middle of the air. Do not go near the edges of it. The edges of the air can be recognized by the appearance of ground, buildings, sea, trees and interstellar space. It is much more difficult to fly there."
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As the test pilot climbs out of the experimental aircraft, having torn off the wings and tail in a crash landing, the crash truck arrives, the rescuer sees a bloodied pilot and asks "What happened?". The pilot's reply:"I don't know, I just got here myself!" - Attributed to Ray Crandell (Lockheed test pilot)

Karma is a bitch, part two...

Suspect running from police drowns

The Associated Press

RALEIGH, N.C. --

Authorities say a suspect wanted on an armed robbery charge has drowned after jumping into a lake while running from officers.

Raleigh police say 24-year-old Gabriel Lee Miles ran before he could be arrested Friday afternoon and tried to swim away in a small lake in an industrial area.

Authorities say Miles began to struggle and slipped below the water's surface.

Divers found Miles' body about five hours later.

Aging can be a good thing

I must say that I agree with most of the choices on the above link. Most, but not all.

Goldie Hawn could be 30 years younger and I still wouldn't bang her.

Susan Lucci on the other hand, like a screen door in a hurricane. And as for Morgan Fairchild, so hard that whoever pulled me out would be the next King of England.

Disappointed that Ann-Margaret and Jane Seymour are not on the list. And who could leave out Linda Carter?

Proofread your videos

So, I'm watching TV, and of course there are a lot of political ads bombarding us. By now, you probably have figured out that I'm a conservative Republican, and really don't have a lot of use for liberal democrats. Anyway, Elizabeth Dole is running for re-election to the US Senate for the State of North Carolina, and she has a commercial being aired that has supposed North Carolinians lamenting about how the Federal Government nearly bankrupted all of the tobacco farmers and how the BRAC (Base Realignment and Closure) was threatening North Carolina jobs by the potential closing of military bases. Naturally, the ad mentions in a semi-twisted way to lead you to believe that Elizabeth Dole single-handedly took the lead and fixed these issues. Well, when it mentioned that she saved the bases and created new base jobs, the ad shows a video of an aircraft flying overhead. This is what caught my attention. From the first time I saw the video, something subconscious told me that it was incorrect, but I never really cared enough to follow through with my hunch, since I tend to just ignore political ads. But this evening I noticed the ad coming on, so I decided to pay attention. Yup, there was something genuinely wrong with the airplane shown (bear with me. I'm getting to my point).

So I went Elizabeth Dole's website and pulled up the same video and freeze framed the airplane. See the picture below:



Got it? The airplane in the middle of the screen capture. This is the airplane that is used to graphically demonstrate the efforts Liz has made to save jobs and keep the bases of the United States Armed Forces open in North Carolina. There is only one problem: The airplane is not American!

I'm an airplane nut, and I immediately had my hunch, so I pulled up some Google pics of what I believed the airplane to be and included one below:





This particular aircraft is a naval aircraft, which is apropos, since MCAS-New River and MCAS-Cherry Point both operate naval aircraft. But neither base operates the Dassault-Breguet Super Etendard! The Super Etendard is an older French aircraft that has either been withdrawn from active service or is getting ready to be withdrawn now that more modern aircraft have been introduced into the French armed forces.

You would think that a political ad that targets our military and military support would at least show an American aircraft!

I have nothing witty to say...

I fixed the broken link to Hulu from a previous post. Click above, or at the previous Hulu post. And now, a joke:



A stranger was seated next to a little girl on the airplane.

When the stranger turned to her and said, 'Let's talk. I've heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.'

The little girl, who had just opened her book, closed it slowly and said to the stranger, 'What would you like to talk about?'

'Oh, I don't know,' said the stranger. 'How about nuclear power?' and he smiles.

'OK, ' she said. 'That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first.

A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff - grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?'

The stranger, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence, thinks about it and says, 'Hmmm, I have no idea.'

To which the little girl replies, 'Do you really feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don't know shit?'

Good Obama joke.

While suturing a cut on the hand of a 75 year old Texas rancher, whose hand was caught in a gate while working cattle, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man.

Eventually the topic got around to Obama and his bid to be our President.

The old rancher said, 'Well, ya know, 'Obama is a 'post turtle'.

Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him what's a 'post turtle'?

The old rancher says, 'When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top ,feet a'flailing in the air, that's a 'post turtle'.

'You know he didn't get up there by himself, he doesn't belong up there, he doesn't know what to do while he is up there, and you just wonder what kind of a dumb ass put him up there.'

Final thought for the day: OPEC sells oil for $136.00 a barrel. OPEC nations buy U.S. grain at $7.00 a bushel. Solution: Sell grain for $136.00 a bushel. Can't buy it? Tough! Eat your oil.

Karma is a bitch...

Woman dies in second accident on LBJ

A 22-year-old woman was killed after she was hit by a car while trying to take pictures of a three-vehicle accident on LBJ Freeway early Sunday.

April Sterling of Dallas and her friend were heading west on LBJ Freeway near Plano Road when they stopped so she could take pictures of the accident that occurred about 7:45 a.m., said Dallas police Sgt. Gil Cerda.

Ms. Sterling wanted to get closer to the accident scene so she ran into the HOV lane when a vehicle traveling west struck her, throwing her into the eastbound lanes of the freeway. She was taken to Parkland Memorial Hospital where she died from her injuries.

Happy Fathers Day

Happy Fathers Day to all you dads out there. To celebrate, below are the perfect pictures to celebrate. Why? Because if you are a father, then you are bound to like at least one of the three things shown:

Keeping in touch with my inner geek

Click above for more Star Wars goodness...

OH, boo hoo! Here's a hanky, Obama...

Aww, little Barack is all upset that his wife has been the target of attacks to her character and such. Stop, you're breaking my heart. You put her in the media's eye and have her at the forefront of your coast to coast politicking by having her beside you, making her a political figure. You want her to be the first lady, a political figure. And now you get all pissy and whiny that people are commenting on her?

Hey, readers! Don't forget that this is the woman who, until recently, has been completely unhappy with being an American and openly admitted that she disliked her country. Doubt it? Don't forget that on February 18, 2008 in Milwaukee, she said, "For the first time in my adult life, I am proud of my country." Whoa! Spoken like a lawyer and a Democrat. Interpreted: I'm only happy when I get what I want. Otherwise, screw everybody. Am I blowing things out of proportion? No. Am I making this up? No.

Whoohooo hooo hulu

Ever heard of Hulu? No? They are an up and coming website that is a repository of TV shows and movies. While conducting a check of the available movies the other day, I found that there are several movies that I have not seen that as soon as I find the time to sit down in front of the computer for two hours that I'm going to watch. I've actually considered getting an additional HDMI connector and plugging my laptop into my HDTV and watch the movies that way. Click the above link and enjoy...

Hooo-leeeee crap, it's hot!!!

Ok, this is like the fifth straight day of tempertures in the high nineties. As a matter of fact, yesterday and today touched the 100 degree mark. Here is Eastern North Carolina, it has been absolutely unbearable. My AC unit has been running non-stop. I'm dreading the electric bill.

Anyway, let me tell you how my last week went. My little one started to get what initially looked like chicken pox on Monday. By Tuesday afternoon, he had swelled up so bad that he couldn't make a fist. By Wednesday morning, his face had swelled up so badly that his eyes actually looked squinting. Anyway, to make things worse, my AC quit working last Sunday, and temps in the house got into the mid 90's. The AC didn't get fixed until Monday evening.

On Wednesday, the wife had a 0730 appointment to take my little one to see the doc. I'm pulling into work at 0630 when my phone rings (I live about 30 miles from work). The wife says that she has locked herself out of the house. I tell her to try to jiggle the window near our dining room to shake the lock loose. I wait about ten minutes and call her back. She answers and says she is on her way and not to be mad. It seems that she actually broke out the window trying to open it. But don't worry, she says. Cardboard has been put over the window. I get home and find two file folders taped over the opening with duct tape! So in the blistering afternoon heat I pull out a piece of plywood to cover the window. I give her the measurements to get a new piece of glass, and she gets one with the window caulk, but now I don't have a caulk gun!

Well, I'm actually shortening the whole story, because in amongst that issue was the near panic of my little boy nearly being admitted into the hospital (he wasn't, and is recovering nicely), my trying to teach a class and work my regular job, and the splinter that went so deep into my finger that when I removed it blood sprayed - yes, sprayed - across my hobby desk.

Here's to hoping this upcoming week turns out better.

The gene pool got a little bit cleaner yesterday

Man dies in jump from skydiving plane

June 7, 2008



DUANESBURG, N.Y. - A 29-year-old man is dead after jumping from a skydiving plane Saturday afternoon west of Albany, according to State Police.

Troopers said they received a 911 call shortly before 2 p.m. from the Duanesburg Skydiving Club that a passenger jumped without a parachute.

Sloan Carafello, of Schenectady, was an observer on the flight from which three others were skydiving, police said. They found him next to a house with a damaged roof in Duanesburg, 15 miles west of Albany.

Robert Rawlins, pilot and owner of the Duanesburg Skydiving Club, told the Albany Times Union he was flying the single-engine plane at about 10,000 feet with the man aboard, as well as a skydiving instructor, a student and a videographer.

Rawlins said the instructor, student and videographer stepped out, and as he began to close the plane's door, the man leaped out, holding a camera but no skydiving gear.

Police said they did not suspect foul play

The day of days...

Yesterday was the 64th anniversary of D-day, the Allied invasion of Hitler's Fortress Europa. Now you are saying, "Why is he mentioning this now? He should have posted something yesterday." Actually, I am posting this today to remind people that we should never forget the Greatest Generation, and the sacrifices they made in trying to achieve world peace. D-day was but one day in a horrific war that took millions of lives. We shouldn't pick just one day to remember them; we should remember them every day. Not understanding and appreciating history is a slap in the face of those who made it. Did you know that yesterday was also the 66th anniversary of the last day of the three day engagement known as the Battle of Midway? If you ever want to know what sacrificing yourself for a greater cause is about, read about Torpedo 8 from the USS Hornet.

Things You Don't Want To Hear During Surgery!

Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.

Somebody call the janitor- we'll need a mop.

Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord Of Darkness!

Bo Bo! Come back! Bad dog!

Wait a minute... If that's his spleen, what's this?

Oh no! I just lost my Rolex!

Oops! Has anybody ever survived 500 ml of this stuff before?

Ya know, there's big money in kidneys, and, uh, this guy's got two healthy ones...

Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!

Could you stop that thing from beating? It's throwing off my concentration.

Hey, let's make his leg twitch!

I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses!

Sterile, schmerile, the floor's clean.

What do you mean he WASN'T in for a sex change?

Anyone see where I left that scalpel?

Now, we remove the subject's brain, and place it in the body of an ape!

Gee, I hope he already has some kids...

Bad grammar

Click the link. Nice parody of the recent hit.

Crappy jokes because it wouldn't be right for me to post porn.

How Do You Catch A Unique Rabbit? Unique Up On It. How Do You Catch A Tame Rabbit? Tame Way, Unique Up On It. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest? They Take The Psycho Path. How Do You Get Holy Water? You Boil The Hell Out Of It. What Do Fish Say When They Hit A Concrete Wall? Dam! What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long? Polaroids What Do You Call A Boomerang That Doesn't work? A Stick. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours? Nacho Cheese. What Do You Call Santa's Helpers? Subordinate Clauses. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand? Quatro Sinko. What Do You Get From A Pampered Cow? Spoiled Milk. What Do You Get When You Cross A Snowman With a Vampire? Frostbite. What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches? A Nervous Wreck. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Anyone Can Roast Beef. Where Do You Find A Dog With No Legs? Right Where You Left Him. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils? Because They Have Big Fingers. Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky dive? Because It Scares The Dog. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served OnThe Titanic? Sanka. What Is The Difference Between A Harley And A Hoover? The Location Of The Dirt Bag. Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down? Because They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat. How Are A Texas Tornado And A Tennessee Divorce The Same? Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer

There is no need to say anything about these pics

CSI, oh, my!

This is great. If you've ever rolled your eyes over the corny lines of David Caruso at the beginning of each CSI: Miami, then you will enjoy this.

Scott McClellan: Hero, or Hypocritical Backstabber who wants his own fame and fortune?

As you are aware, former White House spokesman, Scott McClellan, made blistering remarks over the Bush Administration' handling of such things as Iraq and Hurricane Katrina, and criticizes the liberal media for falling for all of the propaganda. I questioned what motivated this man to turn on his own, and then I found a report about an email that Bob Dole sent to him. Read on...

In an email obtained by Politico, former GOP senator and presidential candidate Bob Dole harshly criticizes former White House Press Secretary Scott McClellan for keeping quiet while serving in the Bush Administration only to write a money-making book critical of the administration once he had left.

"There are miserable creatures like you in every administration who don’t have the guts to speak up or quit if there are disagreements with the boss or colleagues," Dole wrote. "No, your type soaks up the benefits of power, revels in the limelight for years, then quits, and spurred on by greed, cashes in with a scathing critique."

"No doubt you will 'clean up' as the liberal anti-Bush press will promote your belated concerns with wild enthusiasm," Dole added. "When the money starts rolling in you should donate it to a worthy cause, something like, 'Biting The Hand That Fed Me.' Another thought is to weasel your way back into the White House if a Democrat is elected. That would provide a good set up for a second book deal in a few years"

Dole's spokesman confirmed that the email is authentic.

The 1996 Republican nominee wrote that McClellan should have spoken up at the time if he had concerns about the administration, writing that doing so "would have taken integrity and courage."

Concludes Dole: "You’re a hot ticket now but don’t you, deep down, feel like a total ingrate?"

Thinking on your feet is very important

A wife and her husband were having a dinner party for some guests. The wife was very excited about this and wanted everything to be perfect. At the very last minute, she realized that she didn't have any snails for the dinner party, so she asked her husband to run down to the beach with the bucket to gather some snails. Very grudgingly he agreed. He took the bucket, walked out the door, down the steps, and out to the beach. As he was collecting the snails, he noticed a beautiful woman strolling alongside the water just a little further down the beach. He kept thinking to himself, "Wouldn't it be great if she would even just come down and talk to me?" He went back to gathering the snails. All of a sudden he looked up, and the beautiful woman was standing right over him. They started talking and she invited him back to her place. They ended up spending the night together. At seven o'clock the next
morning he woke up and exclaimed, "Oh no!!! My wife's dinner party!!!" He gathered all his clothes, put them on real fast, grabbed his bucket, and ran out the door. He ran down the beach all the way to his apartment. He ran up the stairs of his apartment. He was in such a hurry that when he got to the top of the stairs, he dropped the bucket of snails. There were snails all down the stairs. The door opened just then, with a very angry wife standing in the door way wondering where he's been all this time. He looked at the snails all down the steps, then he looked at her, then back at the snails and said, "Come on guys, we're almost there!!"