Change?

Barack Obama is running on a platform of change. Exactly what is he going to change? How is he going to change it? Whenever I hear a democrat talk about "change," I see an increase in the nanny state of being; taxpayer money going to pay for social services, like free medical insurance, free food stamps, free housing...basically making hard working people work even harder to let fat, lazy, welfare-addicted people have their way. Obama is nothing more than a rhetoric-spouting gas bag.

Another thing to ponder: A president is tasked with guarding the sovereignty of the United States, defending it against all enemies, and sending America's sons and daughters into harm's way. EVERY president should be required to have had military experience!

Time for a laugh

I saw a billboard that read: "Need help? Call Jesus. 1-800-555-3787" So out of curiosity I did. Twenty minutes later a Mexican showed up with a lawnmower.

So this guy goes into a whorehouse. Once in the room with the prostitute, he puts $50 on the table and drops his pants. The hooker almost faints, the guy has a 18 inch cock. She says," Hold on pal, I'll lick it, I'll suck it, but you're not sticking that in me." The man pulls up his pants and picks up his $50 and says, " Screw that, I can do that myself !"

What do spinach and anal sex have in common? If you were forced to have it as a kid, you'll hate it as an adult.

Vinnie and Hank are drinking, when Vinnie leans over and starts stroking Hank's beard. Vinnie says, "Your face feels just like my wife's pussy." Hank strokes it himself and says, "You're right."

I parked in a disabled space today and a traffic cop shouted to me, "Oi whats your disability?" I said "Tourettes, you fucking cunt!"

I went for a job interview as a blacksmith yesterday, he said "Have you ever shoed a horse?" I said "No, but I've told a donkey to fuck off."

A lady says to the psychiatrist, "I think I might be a nymphomaniac." He says, "I'll see what I can do to help you. My fee is eighty dollars an hour." She says, "How much for all night?"

Women eh! Boob jobs, nose jobs, teeth bleaching, tummy tucks, liposuction, colonic irrigation, botox, pierced ears, nipples, bellys and clits, eyebrows plucked, bikini wax, armpits shaved, lips tattooed, legs waxed, diets, exercise and they wont take it up the ass cause it 'hurts'.

"Take a bunch of flowers home for your wife, sir," urged the street vendor. "I haven't got a wife," replied the young man. "Then buy a bunch for your sweetheart." "I don't have a sweetheart, either." "Well then, buy a couple of bunches to celebrate your luck."

What's the difference between Heath Ledger and Heath Ledger jokes? Heath Ledger jokes will get old.

Zebo, a half blind 5 year old African orphan has to ride 7 miles a day to school with only one leg on a bicycle with buckled wheels and no brakes. Please give just a small donation and we will send you the video it's fucking hilarious!

I was at a cash machine when an old lady came up to me and asked to check her balance. So I pushed her over.

Statistically... 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

A guy gets pulled over by a cop for speeding. As the copper is writing up the ticket, the guy asks, "Can you arrest me for calling you a filthy name?" "Yes" replies the cop. He then asks, "Can you arrest me for thinking something?" "No" replies the cop. "Well then," says the man, "I think you're an asshole!"

I bumped into my ex-girlfriend in a bar. "I had sex with another woman last night," I told her. "But I was thinking of you the whole time." "You miss me that much?" she asked. "No," I said. "But it kept me from coming too fast."

I love roadside attorneys

So, the WBC was here, and I had to leave my vacation early to deal with it. I was tasked with being the on-scene command officer directly between the demonstrators and the counter-demonstrators. A few observations come to mind:

First, the fat tub of shit who was apparently a self-proclaimed expert in laws who wanted to debate with me about state law: Yes, I am aware that NC law says it is a misdemeanor to desecrate the US or NC flags. No, I am not going to charge any of the WBC wackos with this statute. Why? Because the "abuse" of the US Flag is Constitutionally protected speech. This has been proven before in flag burning cases. I'm not going to satisfy your rabble rousing, mis-guided passions in a brief display of police powers. If you've ever eaten out your wife, or received a blow job, or used a dildo (you or her), or butt-fucked your gay lover, then you have committed felonies and need to turn yourself in! What about it, Pork? Some laws are there that are unenforceable. There are others if you read through the books...

Second, if you are a counter-protestor, it would help if you didn't look and speak like you were a founding member of the concept of trailer trash. Yelling personal attacks and flipping the single digit salute does not demonstrate a high level of intelligence.

Third: I love the military, and as a student of military history, I have a great understanding of the sacrifices and heroism of the American Fighting Man. That being said, don't climb off your Harley and approach me in your "I-don't-ever-bathe-but-instead-cover-my-body-odor-with-leather" garments and make the proclamation, "I fought for their freedom in Viet Nam so that they have the right to do that!" Uhh,...err...I'm not aware of the sovereignty of the United States ever being seriously threatened by the Vietnamese (or by an Iraqi, since we have a lot of bumper stickers around proclaiming "My daddy fights for our freedom in Iraq.").

Fourth: The 50 or so people who counter protested, and the media people who arrived, did nothing but reinforce the WBC's efforts. They feed off the attention.

Fifth: This is directed to the motorists who felt it necessary to slow down and flip the bird with shouts of "fuck you." Do you feel better? Did that make you feel like a big man?

Ok, got it off my chest.

I've never trusted Oprah...

Oprah Winfrey has long touted female empowerment. Oprah is one who argues that women can do anything a man can do. Oprah has long supported women in leadership, powerful roles. Oprah says that women need to strive to attain all that they can. So...we finally have a female presidential candidate that has a chance at becoming President of the United States. We have a female candidate who is strong-willed and educated. We have a female candidate who is articulate and also is a strong proponent of women's rights. By and far, any feminist or supporter of women climbing corporate ladders would clearly be supporters of a woman with the qualities of Hilary Clinton. Hilary IS the type of woman that Oprah wants. Hilary HAS the background and capabilities that Oprah wants.

So...Oprah plays the race card and gives her support to the black guy. Hypocrite!

We have misplaced priorities

Heath Ledger this, and Heath Ledger that. Nothing but Heath Ledger on all of the news channels and the Inside Hard Special Copy Edition. Yes, I guess it is tragic that somebody who has the world by the balls dies at such an early age. Heath, Heath, Heath. Did you know that on the same day of his death, a 21 year old United States Marine died for his country, killed while engaged in combat against an armed adversary far from home? I didn't think so.

At least the death of Heath has kept Brittany Spears out of the headlines.

Snow at the beach

Holy crap, it is cold! I took the family to Myrtle Beach for a couple of days just to get away from home. I've been dealing with the upcoming visit of the Westboro Baptist Church, which has tapped out all of our resources. You wouldn't expect sub-freezing temps in Myrtle Beach, but we had flurries yesterday and it will get in the teens tonight!

The following is the 2007 winning entry from an annual contest at Texas A&M University calling for the most appropriate definition of a contemporary term. This year's termwas Political Correctness. The winner wrote, "Political Correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end."

Ernie is right!

I bought a bird feeder. I hung it on my back porch and filled it with seed. Within a week we had hundreds of birds taking advantage of the continuous flow of free and easily accessible food. But then the birds started building nests in the boards of the patio, above the table, and next to the barbecue. Then came the poop. It was everywhere: on the patio tile, the chairs, the table...everywhere. Then some of the birds turned mean. They would dive bomb me and try to peck me even though I had fed them out of my own pocket. And other birds were boisterous and loud. They sat on the feeder and squawked and screamed at all hours of the day and night and demanded that I fill it when it got low on food. After a while, I couldn't even sit on my own back porch anymore. I took down the bird feeder and within three days the birds were gone. I cleaned up their mess and took down the many nests they had built all over the patio. Soon, the back yard was like it used to be... quiet, serene and no one demanding their rights to a free meal. Now let's see... our government gives out free food, subsidized housing, free medical care, free education and allows anyone born here to be an automatic citizen. Then the illegals came by the tens of thousands. Suddenly our taxes went up to pay for free services, small apartments are housing 5 families, you have to wait 6 hours to be seen by an emergency room doctor, your child's 2nd grade class is behind other schools because over half the class doesn't speak English, Corn Flakes now come in a bilingual box, I have to press 'one' to hear my bank talk to me in English, and people waving flags other than 'Old Glory' are squawking and screaming in the streets, demanding more rights and free liberties. Maybe it's time for the government to take down the bird feeder.

When you dress like a ghoul, ghouls will try to get in your pants.

Has everybody seen the media articles about the reasonably attractive blonde who was asked to leave a Southwest Airlines flight because of how she was dressed? If not, let me describe the scenario: Said female gets on plane and is approached by Southwest employee. Employee tells female that she was dressed to provacatively and needed to take a later flight. Female protests, adjusts her clothing, and is allowed to take flight.

How was she dressed? Well, nothing too trashy, but she clearly dressed in a way to draw attention to herself. You would argue otherwise? Well, our blonde was wearing a white denim mini-skirt, short enough that if she were to bend over past 45 degrees, you would probably see foliage and early morning dew. Her top consisted of a skin tight short shirt to accentuate her tits, followed by a half sweater opened at the top to let her tits out and buttoned by one button under her cleavage. To describe her clothing, it was more along the lines of what a woman would wear to go out to a club to pick up men.

Now, here is the laughable part of the whole thing. It really would not have mattered to me about her apparel, and I would probably have cast an admiring glance her way, but in her complaint, she said that she was embarrassed and the scolding she received from the employee drew everybody's attention to her! No, Bimbette. The employee did not draw attention to you. Your slut attire drew attention to you.

Hobbies, hobbies, hobbies

This here is my Japanese I-400 aircraft carrying submarine. I usually build WW2 1/48 scale aircraft, but I needed a change of pace, so I built a 1/700 scale sub. The base is Milliput sculpting putty, painted with a thick coat of dark blue and a dry brushing of light blue and white. The sub was actually the largest submarine of WW2, and was designed to carry two specially built Seiran floatplanes in a watertight hanger to a location close US targets and bomb them.

I'm still here

Yes, folks, I am still here. The lack of broadband Internet access has limited me to the frequency of my blog updates. I've noticed the continuing work of Time Warner contractors in front of the house, and when I went out to speak to one of the crewmembers, he pointed out that they were running HD cable lines through the area. Only problem is, he couldn't say when the broadband service would be available to me.

So, what does that mean? Not a heck of a lot, just the continued reduction of my opinions, rants, and observations, plus a noticeable lack of photos, since uploading them takes forever at 28k.

Time for some more Religion of Peace truths...

"It is not a lack of freedom and democracy that produces terrorists. Neither North Koreans nor Cubans are busy blowing themselves up in cafes. The common denominator among all major terrorist producing states is Islam, as politically incorrect as it may be to say. It is this narrow and unbending theocratic civilization, which often provides education only in the form of uncompromising religious indoctrination, that actually supplies most of the fuel for world terror. However, it is the caustic sense of humiliation among many Muslims over Western ascendancy that actually lights the fuse. Muslims are raised on the belief that Islam, the perfect faith, is superior to all other religions and that the only reason that Islam is not ascendant is that the West is undermining it. Many Muslims simply find it impossible to attribute their current situation to their own civilization's failures."

Well, I still haven't had time to try out my favorite games on Vista. Interestingly, I think the solitaire game on Vista is harder than the solitaire game on XP. I know, how can that be, you ask? I'm not sure, but I can usually win about 1 in every 10 games in XP, but that is definitely a rarity in Vista! Not sure why...

How about this heat? I have a creek that goes behind my property. When we moved in last October, I started working on clearing a path to the creek, since it was a nice, fast flowing creek that varied from several inches deep to about a foot deep in certain parts behind the house. I helped my little boy build a twig and stick dam, elevating the water level to about two feet. Great times! Now, with the current drought conditions here in eastern NC, that same creek has not had any water in it since April. It is bone dry, with plants and trees growing on the creek bed. It has been so dry - in fact - that we've had several serious gulley washers pass through the area in the past two weeks, and even those torrential downpours in the area have failed to put any water in the creek. To think that I was getting ready to go over to the creek by my parents' house and catch some minnows to release in my creek! Anyway, at least the mosquito population has been kept low. You can actually go outside in the evening and not need a blood transfusion when you come back inside.

I watched the season premiere of Dogfights on the History Channel last Friday. I had purchased the first season boxed set, and my little 6 year old has been running them like mad. He's the only 6 year old I know who can give you detailed specifications on the Bismark class battleships and various combat aircraft! I think it's great, because he doesn't realize that he is learning history, since it is just "fun stuff" to him.

Vista pains

So, I am still on my vacation, this being the first day that I was actually out of work. It would have been cheaper for to have gone to work. I spent over 300 bucks on a new fish tank, and then bought a new computer with 19" LCD and AIO printer. The computer is made by Acer, who was the maker of my very first computer, which really sucked (actually, I believe the OS - Windows 98 - is what made it suck). I've not heard a lot of good things about Acers, but I couldn't pass up the package deal. Plus, I only need to get about three or four years out of it to make it worthwhile. My previous home desktop was an eMachines, and I got five fantastic years out of that computer. It was still going strong when the motherboard finally gave up. So, I am also enduring the pain of learning a new operating system. Vista Home Premium is unusual, I'll tell you that. I played hell trying to get my Office 2000 to load, but I persevered, because I'll be damned if I'm going to pay $200 just for Word, Excel, and Powerpoint.

I'll have to figure out whether my favorite game - Empire Earth, Art of Conquest - will play on Vista. Stay tuned...

...and life continues...

I know that it has been a long time since I posted, and my posts have come less and less. The basic reason for this is because I no longer have broadband, and doing updates-including photos and such-takes way too much time with paltry ole dial-up.

Life continues at the new house. I recently discovered that the wooded area that surrounds my property on three sides is rampant with blackberry vines. Now, blackberry vines are listed as a nuisance weed in many locales, but who can deny the sweet, fruity taste of blackberries? The blackberries will go along great with the apple (2 types), pear (2 types), mango (don't ask how my mother managed to get mango to grow here!), and fig trees I have growing. Plus, I have a garden with abundant amounts of tomatoes, peppers, and yellow squash (I accidently killed my snow peas!!!).

Anyway, today is Father's Day. I look at my life and must say that things can't get much better (except for hitting the lottery). I have a nice home. I have a healthy little boy. My parents are healthy and nearby. I have a really hot wife who is the MILF of all of the local county emergency services employees but is in love with yours truly. I'm healthy. Life is great!!! Of course, I have worked hard to get to where I am.

I will try to be less of a stranger from now on, dial-up or no dial-up. Just don't expect fancy pictures.

Happy Fathers Day to all the dads out there!

So the weather gets warm, and I open up the windows. Then the pollen starts, and it becomes the worst pollen allergy season I've ever endured, so the windows get closed, and the a/c gets turned on, and I turn off the gas log pilot light. Then the weather gets so cold, we set record lows, and the gas logs won't come back on because something is blocking the line! In addition, the shoots of zucchini squash, vine tomatoes, and snow peas all die despite my best efforts when the air around the garden drops to 24 freakin' degrees!

Anyway, work progresses on the house. I booted the 18 year old out of the house when he felt like he should be able to do whatever he wants, so we are converting his room into an office. The painting is finally complete, so now we have to move the computer desk and purchase additional furniture for the room.

Hypocrite

I just saw Hillary Bitch'em Clinton on the news, and she was proclaiming that had she been president in 2002, then the US would never have been embroiled in the fighting in Iraq. I wonder: Was she not on the Senate Intelligence Committee in 2002? Did she not have access to the same intelligence that the President had? Did she not vote for action in Iraq? Did she not say that she thought Saddam was a threat to peace in the region?

Just thought I would remind everybody of that.

We recently had a section of highway named after Martin and Coretta King. Now, I'm not a big fan of the entire concept of civil rights, since it can often subject an individual to a governmental end around the double jeopardy clause, and the concept has been overly abused over the years. I am a fan of the concept that all people should be treated the same, and all men (and women) are equal.

That being said, you can guess the race of the majority of the audience that attended the formal unveiling of the names, and that is fine, since Dr. King worked so hard and gave his life trying to get blacks to be treated the same as whites. The problem I have is a statement made by one of the "enlightened ones" at the unveiling. Dr. King's legacy is one of peace and equality for all races and religions. So, what does our enlightened female say? "The naming of this road represents my race." Oh, really?

Remember: White people aren't the only ones who are racist.

I'm still alive!

I am still enduring the pain of having dial-up. Fortunately, the local company only charges $7 per month. I have been a pain in the ass for Charter, and I will continue to be a pain in the ass until they decide to extend out to my house. Hell, from the main highway to my house, there are approximately 16 houses. If only 10 wanted Internet and/or cable TV, the cost of extending the lines would be quickly offset by the approximately $700 in monthly revenue, multiplied by 12, multiplied by many years to come!

Anyway, who would have thought that I would be wearing shorts in January?

The American Dream

So, the cable company told me that cable is a no-go for where I'm at. That left Satellite Internet through HughesNet. Now, I'm talking to the DirectTV guy, and he says that even with the special package offer and discounts, that they will require over $300 just for set-up fees, plus my credit card so HughesNet can do automatic credit card charges. Bullshit!! First, if I'm trying to purchase your product for an extended period of time (such as cable, satellite, or Internet), then I shouldn't have to front up some money. Second, nobody-and I mean Nobody!-gets a free shot at charging my credit card each month. So, I voice my displeasure with the DirectTV guy, and he then goes Sotto Voce and tells me that hang in there for a couple of months, since DirectTV was probably going to get into the satellite Internet business pretty soon, and it would be a heck of a lot cheaper that Hughes-stick-it-in-your-ass-Net.

Anyway, yesterday I had an almost totally perfect day. I woke up in my own bed, in my own home, on my own piece of land. I turned on my own TV to listen to the news, fixed a hot cup of coffee, and got my newspaper out of the paper box in my front yard. As I walked out to retrieve my paper, I could see the first rays of sunlight, and the early birds chirping. I walked past my own vehicle and across my own lawn and back. I had breakfast and worked in my workshop for several hours on some models. I did some easy yard work, watched TV, and read some magazines. I carved two pumpkins for my son. Later, I threw some chops on the grill, along with some corn on the cob and asparagus. Afterwards, I took a hot shower and relaxed on my couch. This, my friends, is the American Dream.

Yaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!

OMFG! Dial-up really sucks. I am in a location where I am too far away from the cable lines and too far away from the nearest DSL node. Therefore, I am stuck using my back-up dial-up connection that I've always had. It looks like the only option I will have for broadband is satellite, which I've not heard good things about. I harrassed my local cable company to come out and do a study, and they did. I'll know the answer to whether they will come out my way next week.

Jeez, buying a house is painful! Our scheduled closing date was moved back four days, and it might be moved back, again. The inspector saw a termite. No, not a termite infestation, not a termite nest, nor any termite damage: He saw a freakin' termite. So, now we have to wait for the termite killer to come and do whatever it is the Orkin man does to keep those pesky termites in check, which means if he doesn't get his thumb out of his ass, the closing date will be moved again. Now, factor in the fact that the insurance company was going to deny insuring the house because of a vine growing up the power cable, and a missing brick on the front porch. A plant and a freakin' brick!

Anyway, the plant is history, and the brick is of a different color, so we will hopefully close soon.

Religion of Peace Strikes Again

Remember: When a Christian burns down a church, it is a hate crime. When a Muslim burns down a church, it is merely a protest.

Everyone loves a good blow...

Well, we survived another tropical storm. TS Ernesto came through at the end of last week and dumped nearly a foot of rain on us. Some of the surrounding counties suffered some serious flooding.

The wife and I put in a bid on a house, and the sellers accepted. It is going to feel weird owning an actual home. This house is in the middle of nowhere. Unfortunately, it is in the next county, since the price of homes in my current county are ludicrous. The problem with my county is that an E-5 in the Marine Corps gets something like $800 in BAQ (basic allowance for quarters). This is money that is in addition to his normal salary. Hence, a serviceman with 5 years in can afford to buy a house in the city, but a city employee doesn't make enough to do the same thing.

We are looking at a 3BR, 2BA brick home on over an acre of land with a wired, air conditioned studio behind the house. There are woods on three sides, so we get plenty of privacy. The downside is that I will have to drive about 35 minutes one way to and from work. I work 5 days a week, but I am planning on adjusting my hours to 4 days a week. The house has a gas log fireplace, so we won't have much of a heating bill in the winter. Tentative closing date on the house is September 22. I'll keep you informed...