I voted

I voted today. Despite early voting having been available for about two weeks, there was still a large number of people coming to vote. As much as I resent the number number of black people who are coming to vote for Obama just because he is black (no arguments: You know that is true!), I am still proud that people are coming out in such numbers to exercise their civic responsibility and vote.

Who did I vote for? Well, it should be obvious that I did not vote for Obama. Race for me was not the issue. The issue (or issues) was his political leanings. That being said, I honestly do feel that he is going to be our next president. On that point, I have feelings of ambivalence. One thing is for sure, and that is that Osama is going to be under the microscope with everything he does. He can't fail, because there will be a ton of "I told you so" comments made towards him. I honestly feel that government handouts will increase, that our taxes will go up, and that further restrictions will be placed on gun owners. I think that we will piss away even more money in foreign aid, and that we will become a pushover in the world's eyes.

As for the other people I voted for, the selection for US Senate was rather interesting, since we have a rather bland Republican candidate running against a state senator who claimed to be the one responsible for preventing the closing of our military bases (actually, they both did). The state senator also claimed that she was responsible for balancing the state budget. Err...that is the law in NC, and you didn't actually do that! I voted for the Republican, mostly because I'm trying to keep as many Democrats out of Congress that I can.

I voted Democrat for the state attorney general, since he actually does a good job.

I voted to get rid of several of our shitbag local judges, and that was about it!

November 4 should be interesting!!! History will be made, one way or the other, and I'm glad that I will be around to see it.

Definition of tragedy

Barack Obama was visiting a primary school and he visited one of the classes. They were in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings. The teacher asked the presidential candidate if he would like to lead the discussion on the word 'tragedy.' So our illustrious democrat presidential candidate asked the class for an example of a 'tragedy.'

One little boy stood up and offered: 'If my best friend, who lives on a farm, is playing in the field and a tractor runs over him and kills him, that would be a tragedy.'

'No,' said Obama, 'that would be an accident.'

A little girl raised her hand: 'If a school bus carrying 50 children drove over a cliff, killing everyone inside, that would be a tragedy.'

'I'm afraid not,' explained Obama. 'That's what we would call great loss.'

The room went silent. No other children volunteered. Obama searched the room. 'Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?'

Finally at the back of the room, Little Johnny raised his hand. In a quiet voice he said: 'If the plane carrying you and Mrs. Obama was struck by a 'friendly fire' missile and blown to smithereens that would be a tragedy.'

'Fantastic!' exclaimed Obama. 'That's right. And can you tell me why that would be tragedy?'

'Well,' says Little Johnny, 'It has to be a tragedy, because it certainly wouldn't be a great loss...and it probably wouldn't be an accident either.'

A woman was in a coma. She had been in it for months.

Nurses were in her room giving her a sponge bath. One of them was washing her private area and noticed that there was a slight response on the monitor whenever she touched her there.

They tried it again and sure enough, there was definite movement. They went to her husband and explained what happened, telling him, 'As crazy as this sounds, maybe a little oral sex will do the trick & bring her out of the coma.'

The husband was skeptical, but they assured him that they would close the curtains for privacy. The husband finally agreed and went into his wife's room. After a few minutes the woman's monitor flatlined, no pulse, no heart rate.

The nurses ran back into the room. 'What happened!?' they cried. The husband said, ' I'm not sure; maybe she choked. '

Dirty Star Wars quotes

Star Wars: A New Hope

"Aren't you a little short for a storm trooper?"

"Curse my metal body, I wasn't fast enough!"

"Get in there you big furry oaf. I don't care what you smell!"

"Look at the size of that thing!"

"Luke, at that speed do you think you'll be able to pull out in time?"

"Put that thing away before you get us all killed!"

"She may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts, kid."

"She's fast enough for you, old man."

"Sorry about the mess..."

"You came in that thing? You're braver than I thought."

"You've got something jammed in here real good."

Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back

"And I thought they smelled bad ... on the outside!"

"But now we must eat. Come, good food, come..."

"Control, control! You must learn control!"

"Hurry up, golden-rod..."

"I must've hit it pretty close to the mark to get her all riled up like that, huh kid?"

"I thought that hairy beast would be the end of me!"

"Possible he came in through the south entrance."

"That's okay, I'd like to keep it on manual control for a while."

"There's an awful lot of moisture in here."

"Size matters not. Judge me by my size, do you?"

Star Wars: Return of the Jedi

"A little higher, just a little higher."

"And hurry up, will ya? I haven't got all day!"

"Back door, huh? Good idea."

"Come here, I won't hurt you. You want something to eat?"

"Grab it. Almost ... you almost got it. Gently now, alright, easy, easy..."

"Hey, don't worry; Chewie and I got into a lot of places more heavily guarded than this."

"Hey Luke, thanks for coming after me, now I owe you one."

"Hey! Point that thing someplace else!"

"How can they be jamming us if they don't know we're coming?"

"I don't think the Empire had wookies in mind when they designed her, Chewie."

"I need more men."

"I never knew I had it in me."

"I think you'll fit in nicely."

"I want you to take her. I mean it, take her!"

"In time you will call me master."

"It'll work. It'll work."

"It's just a dead animal..."

"Keep on that one, I'll take these two."

"Move closer! Get along side that one!"

"Not bad for a little furball."

"Rise, my friend."

"She's gonna blow!"

"There is good in him, I've felt it."

"What could possibly have come over Master Luke?"

"You're a jittery little thing aren't you?"

Muslim Bumper Stickers

My other car is a bomb
This vehicle makes wide right turns into buildings
Keep honking, I'm rewiring
Visualize World Jihad
My other car is in the abdomens of 50 Israeli civilians!
I blew up 500 friendly Iraqis and all I got was this lousy bumper sticker.
0 to KABOOM in .2 seconds.
My 12-year-old can blow up your honor student
In case of Jihad this car will be exploded
What part of ULLULULULULULULU did you not understand?
Martyrs do it like it's their last time
My kid and YOUR money go to Gitmo Bay.
I'm Muslim but you're ugly and I can blow myself up
Baby Terrorist On Board
If you can read this, there's a car bomb in the trunk.
Fatah you looking at?
Honk if you Beat your Wife
Driver carries only $20 worth of C4

WHY?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out"?

Who was the first one who thought that the white thing that came from a hen’s butt looked edible?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp that no decent human being would eat?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

What do you call male ballerinas?

Why ARE Trix only for kids?

If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

Why is a person that handles your money called a Broker?

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

If a man is talking in the forest, and no woman is there to hear him, is he still wrong?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window.

Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?

Colin Powell said...

"All Americans... not just African-Americans" would be proud of an Obama win...

Uhh, not quite, General.

Keep an Obama scorecard

So, Osama Obama is running on a platform of "change," and he will solve all of the problems of the world, according to his own website. I should tell you right up front that I absolutely will NOT vote for ole Hussein. That being said, I am resigned to the fact that the deluded sheep in this country will successfully elect him as our next president.

Here is what I propose. We should monitor his scorecard carefully. According to his website, I should see a tax savings of $1610 once he is in office. We shall see... In addition, Osama...err...Obama said that he will get America away from being dependent on foreign oil and will create new energy sources. He said that he will increase education, so we shall see if we keep graduating dumbasses. He said that he will stop the proliferation of WMD's. Jeez, I hope he's right about that! He said that he is an outspoken critic of the goings on in Darfur, and proposes taking steps to stop the Darfur massacres. I have to be honest with you...I could not care less about what is happening in Darfur. Darfur will always have problems as long as Islam exists.

Barack said that he will create jobs. We shall see...

What is really scary is that he will be a liberal democrap president with a democrap congress...

Family to get Vietnam pilot's 100-plus medals

October 17, 2008 10:50 PM

BOSTON — Helen Tilgner remembers seeing a scar on her father's left knee when she was 7, and realizing he had won a Purple Heart for being shot during combat in Vietnam.

But she had no idea that her father had won more than 100 medals and awards until this year — 26 years after he died when his helicopter crashed in Malaysia while he was flying for a private medical rescue company.

On Saturday, Sen. John Kerry, D-Mass., will present Tilgner and her two sons — both in the Army — with the awards won by her father, Chief Warrant Officer Armit Tilgner, more than three decades after he flew helicopter missions in Vietnam.

"I feel like it is recognition that he should have had long ago, to be remembered with honor, and it's a legacy I get to pass down to my sons so they are better aware of who he really was," said Tilgner.

Armit Tilgner was an instructor pilot with the 1st Aviation Brigade's 128th Assault Helicopter Company. He served six tours in Vietnam, winning numerous awards, including four Bronze Stars, five Army Commendation Medals, three Meritorious Unit Commendation medals, two Valorous Unit Awards, and 136 Air Medal awards. But he never talked about his military honors, so his family only knew about the Purple Heart.

Tilgner retired after 20 years in the Army in 1973 and went to work for a private medical helicopter company, transporting sick people from remote villages in Malaysia to hospitals. In 1982, he was killed at age 48 when his helicopter crashed.

Helen Tilgner discovered her father's discharge papers in her mother's house. On them, she saw a list of codes, and asked an old Army buddy of her father's to translate them for her. The codes all stood for medals her father had won.

"Once I got them decoded, I started flipping out," she said. "I had no idea."

She contacted Kerry again, this time to see if he could have her father's medals replaced.

Karma is a Bitch, Part VII...

Harlem athlete, 19, plunges to death in egg-tossing prank gone wrong

BY KERRY BURKE, MELISSA GRACE and ALISON GENDAR
DAILY NEWS STAFF WRITERS

Monday, October 13th 2008, 9:16 PM

A high school athlete fell to his death in west Harlem Monday when he tried to jump from one roof to another during an egg-tossing prank.

David Diaz, 19, and a few friends were hurling eggs off a roof on W. 135th St. when some of their targets below got angry.

Diaz, one arm in a sling from a sports injury, apparently tried to escape by bolting over a brick wall that he thought separated one building from another, friends and police source said.

Instead, Diaz fell six stories to his death in the courtyard below shortly before 1:30 a.m.

"All you heard was 'Boom! Boom!'" said David Ruiz, 48, president of the tenant association at 612 W. 135th St.

"He hit an air conditioner and then the [ground] floor. But he was alive. This kid was so strong he kept trying to sit up," Ruiz said.

Diaz died several hours later at St. Luke's Hospital, relatives said.

A security alarm on a door to the roof was broken and a Daily News reporter could walk onto the roof some 12 hours after the fatal fall. Two egg cartons were visible on the roof.

"He was my baby. He was a good boy. They were just fooling around," said the teen's mother, Rosa Diaz, outside the family's Bronx apartment. "This shouldn't have happened ... This is terrible. I want to find peace."

Diaz, a senior at Westside High School, was a proud member of the Harlem Jaguars community football team, said coach Pablo Rosario, 21. The team was named citywide champs last year, Rosario said, and Diaz was defensive player of the year.

Rosario had the sad task of passing around a team football for friends to sign.

"I am just going to take it to his mother," Rosario said.

"Hopefully, she'll decide to let him take it with him."

A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered altitude
and spotted a man below. She descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."

The man consulted his GPS and replied, "You are in a hot air balloon approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2346 feet above sea level. You are 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude."
"You must be a republican," said the balloonist.
"I am," replied the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I am still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help so far."

The man responded, "You must be a democrat."
"I am," replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?"
"Well," said the man, "you don't know where you are or where you are going. You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise, which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. The fact is, you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it's my fault."

Michelle Obama makes a visit

Michelle Obama has decided to make a local visit as she stumps for Osama Obama. Let's reiterate what she said on February, 18, 2008: "For the first time in my adult life, I am proud of my country because it feels like hope is finally making a comeback."

OJail, or OJ gets juiced...

Well, since OJ Simpson was found guilty exactly 13 years after the trial in which he REALLY should have been found guilty, I found a couple of pictures that I felt would be appropriate.

Cool!

Click the above link! Tickled the heck out of me. When the first "event" happens, I thought, "Did I just see that?"

Do you know who Mannert L Abele was?

In reference to the previous post, the USS Grunion was skippered by Commander Mannert L Abele. When the Grunion was lost, the US Navy named a destroyer after him. The USS Mannert L Abele has the distinction of being the first ship to be sunk by the secret Japanese suicide rocket plane, known as Okha by the Japanese and the Baka by the Americans. The above link tells the story of the USS Mannert L Abele.

October 3, 2008

Navy confirms lost WWII sub has been found

The Navy has confirmed the wreckage of a sunken vessel found last year off the Aleutians Islands is that of the USS Grunion, which disappeared during World War II.

Underwater video footage and pictures captured by an expedition hired by sons of the commanding officer, Lt. Cmdr. Mannert L. Abele, allowed the Navy to confirm the discovery, Rear Adm. Douglas McAneny said Thursday in a news release.

McAneny said the Navy was very grateful to the Abele family.

"We hope this announcement will help to give closure to the families of the 70 crewmen of Grunion," he said.

The Grunion was last heard from July 30, 1942. The submarine reported heavy anti-submarine activity at the entrance to Kiska, and that it had 10 torpedoes remaining forward. On the same day, the Grunion was directed to return to Dutch Harbor Naval Operating Base. The submarine was reported lost Aug. 16, 1942.

Japanese anti-submarine attack data recorded no attack in the Aleutian area at the time of the Grunion's disappearance, so the submarine's fate remained an unsolved mystery for more than 60 years, the Navy said.

Abele's son's, Bruce, Brad, and John, began working on a plan to find the sub after finding information on the Internet in 2002 that helped pinpoint USS Grunion's possible location.

In August 2006, a team of side scan sonar experts hired by the brothers located a target near Kiska almost a mile below the ocean's surface. A second expedition in August 2007 using a high definition camera on a remotely operated vehicle yielded video footage and high resolution photos of the wreckage.

In this 2006 file photo provided by Williamson & Associates via Bruce Abele shows an underwater sonar image of a black shape near Kiska Island that may be the USS Grunion, which sank off of the island, at the tip of Alaska's Aleutian chain in 1942. The Navy Thursday Oct. 2, 2008 has confirmed the wreckage of a sunken vessel found last year off the Aleutians Islands is that of the USS Grunion, which disappeared during World War II. (AP Photo/Williamson & Associates via Bruce Abele, File)

This photo provided by the Electric Boat Co. via Bruce Abele shows the U.S. submarine, USS Grunion in this March 20, 1942 file photo. Commander, Submarine Forces Pacific Fleet, Rear Adm. Douglas McAneny announced Thursday Oct. 2, 2008 that a sunken vessel off the coast of the Aleutian Islands is in fact the World War II submarine USS Grunion (SS 216). (AP Photo/Electric Boat Co. via Bruce Abele)

Here are the top ten comments made by sports commentators that they
may wish to take back:


1. Weightlifting commentator at the Olympic Snatch and Jerk Event: "This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning during her warm up, and it was amazing."


2. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator: "This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother."


3. Grand Prix Race Announcer: "The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it, which is exactly identical to the one in front of the similar one in back."


4. Greg Norman, Pro Golfer: "I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father."


5. Ringside Boxing Analyst: "Sure there have been injuries and even some deaths in boxing -- but none of them really that serious."


6. Baseball announcer: "If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again."


7. Basketball analyst: "He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn't like it. In fact you can see it all over their faces."


8. At a trophy ceremony BBC TV Boat Race 1988: "Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the Cambridge president is hugging the cox of the Oxford crew."


9. Metro Radio, College Football: "Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."


10. US Open TV Commentator: "One of the reasons Arnie Palmer is playing so well is that, before each final round, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them.... Oh my God, what have I just said?!"